Skip to main content

2020: Rough Six Months

We are almost at the midpoint of 2020, I am not sure where the last 6 months have gone. Gone they have though. On personal level it has been quite a taxing 6 months. Losing my job was big knock to my confidence, which I am not over yet. The initial feeling of " I will be okay I will get back out there and get another gig", soon melted like 'Snaw aff a dyke'*. (* For some, I realise that you need a translation. "Snow off a stone wall" ) . Jobs are asking for skills that I had not invested time in gaining. Oh hindsight you were hitting me hard and hitting me often. Reading many of the job specs did make me feel like a bit of a has-been living off past glories. I got comfortable in my wee bubble. I have been trying to upskill, but  I am already several laps behind most of the competitors. Some who already picking up their meddles and gone down the pub to celebrate.


Then Coronavirus swept across the land. Overnight companies were getting rid of people rather than taking them on. Job hunting took on an extra added level of complexity. When I did get an opportunity for an interview it was over a video link. That in itself is not a bad thing as such. If anything I actually think doing interviews by video link can be too relaxing. When I get too relaxed I start to ramble all over the place. Going forward all first interviews are going to conducted by video.


In July 2020 got even grimmer. I heard the sad news that an old university friend has passed away, 2 years before. It turns out I am rubbish at Facebook and keeping up to date. I had been wishing my old uni friend Sarah's birthday wishes for a couple of years with no reply. I thought that she had gone off Facebook as have a few people I know do. In the past, she had gone quiet for a few months and then pop backed on. I thought her absence was another one of those breaks she was taking. I wished her happy birthday and got a reply from her brother saying she has passed away in '18.


Sarah was only 48, I left me stunned. This led me to ask a few other friends on Facebook if they knew, one did and the others hadn't known. The one that had known better at keeping up to date with Facebook comments. I was still miffed at him for not letting people know. I suppose there were reasons for it and did not push him on why he had not. I was also shocked that no one had done anything a way of tribute to her so I dashed off a rather clumsy attempt at one. Her brother appreciated it as did a few others. I later friended her brother on Facebook and he told me what exactly had happened. It was not pleasant reading.


I had last spoken to Sarah at the end of '16 it had been a brief phone call. She had been having a lot of trouble in her life but she seemed to be optimistic about the future. We ended the call by promising to keep in touch but we never did. Her brother told me had happened in the intervening years up to her passing. Depression and drinking caused personality and health issues. This led to her untimely passing. It did make think that we should always look out for each other. Especially now that we are living in an age where we even more isolated than normal.




I know this has not been a particularly happy blog post, but 2020 so far has not been a particularly happy one so far. Half glass full or half glass empty? Well, I am saying let's get a new full glass and start again. That is going to be my mental starting point as I swing into the next six months. Let us hope things will improve for the better.


Take care and be safe. Remember talk to each other!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Feedback.

Yes, indeed I am still very much unemployed. I have had a couple of video interviews that have sadly been unsuccessful. One of the interviews I did was with someone I used to work with so there was no hiding place in that one. There were two pieces of telling feedback from them. The first was that they thought that maybe the learning curve in the job might be too much for me. They thought I was too "Product based" and they were "Project-based" which I absolutely understand but I think I could easily transition to that kind of work process but they obviously  did not feel that. I should cotton on to that in the interview but did not at the time. The second piece of feedback was actually quite interesting and did make me sit up to think. They thought I was too negative about my previous employer and my experience there; which as I have already documented was not exactly a happy one. This has got me thinking about how do you go about talking about previous employment e...

Day 19 of 2022: Feeling a Bit Useless

Imposter Syndrome kicking in It might be mid-week blues or me having an off day, but today I felt like I was not good enough for my job. The old confidence took a but of dunt when I lost my job a couple of years back. I am not sure I have worked that through the how's and whys of what happened. That might be for another day, I am kicking that particular can down the road. Today I felt as if was not contributing enough, I am trying to feel my around and a complicated Software Package. It is a bit like being in a dark room. I am also blindfolded and there is a voice yelling "Why haven't you found it yet-get a move on". One crumb of comfort is that I am in this situation with other people who are in the same predicament. We keep bumping into each other and saying "Have you found the door yet", "Nope" and off we bumble. When I lost the job, I did contemplate "I am cut out to be Tester?" Today I found myself contemplating that question again....

Day 25 of 2022 : Behind the Walled Garden of Delights

In Your Garden of Delights.. The other day I noticed a story about Disney clawing back a lot of their content is on Netflix. It would appear the days of shared content across platforms is diminishing. The streaming providers want to keep you in their walled garden for as much as possible. If you are a serious tv watcher you are now going to have to subscribe to at least three if not four providers. All that to watch your fave film or TV show. My arithmetic is not that great but it would be safe to say that would be not shy of well over £350 a year. Ouch. We have Prime and Netflix and we do watch them a lot. I had Prime when it was Love Film and £4.99 was a good price. When Amazon came along and waved their wonga at Love Film I continued to only pay £4.99 for years and years. It was down the contract that Amazon had to fulfil. I have since upgraded to a Prime user so now fork out £7.99. My wife decided to pay for Netflix, as she wanted to watch a certain show for a bit. I have to be hon...